Owning your confidence
Updated: Sep 24
I struggled with my self-confidence growing up. I doubted myself a lot, especially in high school. I would go through phases of self-doubt where I would feel unworthy and insecure. All these factors came into play because, at the time, I didn't love myself to the fullest, and I would take other people's opinions to heart. People will always have an opinion about you, but your opinion about yourself is the most important. Forming a progressive and positive view of yourself is an intense journey that takes many trials and errors.
As a teenager, I struggled to be myself. I didn't truly understand what "me" was because I was still figuring out what I wanted to be in life. However, amid the self-doubt, I was determined. That is what kept me going. I was determined to succeed and become someone great no matter what. I felt that fire in me during my senior year of high school. By that time, I had a plan. I knew what I was going to college for and felt eager to start the next chapter of my life. Sometimes, that fire doesn't spark until later in life, and it's okay. There is no right or wrong in that. I was confident in the young woman I was becoming, and nothing would stop me, including other people's opinions about my decision to go into broadcast journalism. I knew my career choice would mean taking major leaps and sacrifices. It was not going to be an easy road at all. I was 17. I was a California State University Northridge (CSUN) freshman, ready for whatever came my way. That was my confidence finally speaking to me.
During my first year at CSUN, I landed my first internship at The Hollywood Reporter in Los Angeles. All I had on my resume was high school newspaper writing experience, but that didn't stop me from applying. I have learned that sometimes you must take a leap of faith, no matter how small you feel. The second I landed that internship, I remember walking out of there feeling more determined than ever to pursue journalism. I had to start somewhere. It ended up being one of five internships I completed in college. If it wasn't for owning my confidence, I truly don't know if I would have been able to land any of those internships. Don't get me wrong, I was also given a lot of no's while in college. But that only gave me more fuel to keep on going.
There will always be an opinion out there, and you ultimately have the power to determine the outcome. You have the choice to decide - will I let this define me? Or will I move past it and own my self-worth? As I mentioned, owning your confidence starts with your inner dialogue. It's re-assuring yourself of your potential. It all starts with how you speak to yourself from the minute the day begins. It's incredible how the mind works. It's like a muscle that you can strengthen. You have the ability to control your thoughts. Why not empower yourself every morning and tell yourself you will own your day? That you got this! That's confidence right there. This is by no means a straight road. However, just taking that small step can make a huge difference.
I share this because I have been through this process many times in my career. Especially when it comes to being on camera. If I don't own my confidence every single night, how will you watching at home trust what I'm saying? Another example is giving a speech. How will other people think of you if you don't believe what you say? The same thing applies to clothes. If you love what you wear, you may feel ten times more confident hosting that event.
Confidence starts from within. You have to be your biggest fan. The inner guidance exists. You must choose your best self daily and push away the negative self that keeps you complacent. When you love yourself, your positive self-talk is a game changer. It all comes down to owning it; you hold so much more power than you might think.
If I could define myself in one word, it would be - bold. I can proudly say I am a confident 28-year-old successful woman who loves her career and is still learning and growing. It doesn't matter what other people think of you. As long as you know your dreams and what you truly want, that's all you need. This doesn't mean not to be open to feedback and advice. That is all required to be successful. You have to be willing to trust the process, just not the negative talk from others.
I challenge you to write down one word that you believe defines you. From that one word, ask yourself - why? What does this word mean to you, and how do you own your confidence every day? Can your inner dialogue be better? What needs to change? These are just a few questions you can ask yourself, and you might discover something else about yourself. After reading this, I hope you feel inspired to further tap into your confidence. Just remember, you can do anything you set your mind to. Stay empowered and embrace all aspects of the journey. Most importantly, don't give up. You hold the power.